How many people around you are suffering from anxiety? Everyone is familiar with feeling anxious on some level – perhaps feeling nervous or even losing sleep through worry – but what about when that sinking feeling turns into something worse? What happens when those butterflies stop fluttering and start pounding you from the inside? How do you cope when apprehension morphs into fear and kick starts a panic attack?
An anxiety disorder, like many other mental illnesses, is really hard to comprehend if you haven't suffered from it yourself. I, personally, don’t have an anxiety disorder and the closest I’ve come to understanding anywhere near that level of anxiety are a couple of mild panic attacks. Neither lasted longer than 10 minutes and my terrible explanation of those situations would be that I just couldn’t take in enough oxygen (which is just as bad as my explanation of fainting: ‘I just had to lie down, so I did’).
Panic attacks make you feel like your heart is beating irregularly, you sweat, feel sick and tremble, amongst other feelings that relate to a lack of control. Imagine this happening regularly and uncontrollably, alongside many other symptoms that make each day a struggle. I can only guess that what makes it even harder is having people around you who don’t understand what you're going through.
Blogger and YouTuber Zoella suffers from anxiety and panic attacks, and has created blog posts and videos on the subject in a bid to reassure young people that they’re not alone in their suffering. She does recognise that everyone is programmed differently but offers tips for helping loved ones who are suffering from anxiety, such as giving them space and not talking to them if they are panicking.
Here are three key tips to bear in mind so that you can help a friend or loved one with an anxiety disorder:
ONE: Don’t tell them what to do
They can’t simply ‘stop worrying’ or ‘not panic’. It’s not that easy and it's completely out of their control. Instead, just take a step back and be there for them when they need you.
TWO: Be a good friend
Be proud of them when they achieve something scary without panicking, talk to them when they want to discuss their anxiety, and let them know you’re always there.
THREE: Be yourself
Doing something out of character or feeling nervous yourself isn’t going to help when their anxiety levels are high. Don’t make a fuss, just being their friend is helpful enough.
Of course, everyone is different. Always ask what they need and don’t assume you know. If you need any more help and advice, mental health charity Mind are a great place to turn.
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