When relationships get really scary... by Emma

Because it’s not all butterflies and holding hands...

ONE 

When it’s not a relationship at all. It’s basically just a Tinder match and a few awkward messages. Will you meet up? Will it be anything more than just an awkward date? Maybe you’ll get married and have babies. Oh, another Tinder match. Maybe not. 

TWO

A house party with all his friends. Harmless, right? Then why do you feel so nervous?! Dragging your friends along whether they like it or not helps – as does getting really drunk beforehand. 

THREE 

When you wake up at his and you’re so hungover it hurts. You’re probably going to be sick. No wait... you’re definitely going to be sick – and there is no hiding it.

FOUR 

When it’s kind of a relationship, but kind of not. There have been dates, you’ve stayed at his, he’s stayed at yours, but you haven’t left a toothbrush there, let alone had the conversation about "what this is". 

FIVE

The first time you don’t have freshly shaved legs, matching underwear or a full face of  makeup on in front of him. "He’s 100% going to think I’m disgusting. Aww... he just said I’m beautiful. What a keeper."

SIX

When you’ve been invited to a wedding that’s six months away. Do you ask him to be your plus one? You need to RSVP and this is the hardest decision you’ve made since picking which way to swipe on Tinder. 

SEVEN

You’ve avoided it for so long, but it’s really time meet his parents. What to wear? Will they hate you? To be fair, they probably think you’re stealing away their only son, so you’re kind of doomed. 

EIGHT

When you realise that you’ve only been listening to the bands that he likes – and you like them! “Am I even my own person anymore?”

NINE

The moment he says "I love you". What do you say?! Do you love him? You think you do, but you don’t know. If you cry, will he think you’re a massive girl pants? Probably. This is a nightmare. But he loves you! What a fantastic time to be alive. 

TEN

Woah, you’re moving in together. This is moving way too fast. But it’s pretty amazing, huh? But how do you manage to – you know – do your business when you're living together? And you’ve been so discreet with your bowel movements up until this point – damn it. 

ELEVEN

The moment when you go to open a joint bank account... “I don’t think I’m ready for this, I just want to spend all my money on ASOS, and on lipsticks and candles.”

TWELVE 

When your grandparents keep asking when you’re getting married and mentioning that they were married with four kids by now. Awkward. 

THIRTEEN 

When you have another meeting at the bank and you’re talking about mortgages. So grown up! Wait a minute, didn’t you read that mortgages are harder to get out of than a marriage? OH NO, THIS IS ALL TOO MUCH.

EMMA IS A WRITER WHO WORKS IN MARKETING. YOU CAN FIND HER OVER ON HER BLOG EMMABUDD.COM OR ON TWITTER. FIND MORE POSTS BY EMMA HERE...

ILLUSTRATION BY AMELIA FLOWER. YOU CAN FIND MORE OF HER WORK AT ameliaflower.co.uk.